10 Things to Remember when you Become a 2nd Time Mum
I feel like there is a lot going on in my head as I prepare to become a mum for the 2nd time. I wanted to jot down a few things to remember as I enter into motherhood for the second time.
No.1 Ultimately I know that the extra work of raising multiple children will be worth it. I’m not under any illusion that transitioning from 1 - 2 won’t come with its challenges. Some I’m prepared for, some I can’t possibly foresee, but I know that no matter what, it’ll be worth every single second.
Better prepared for labour this time round. When I was pregnant with Mila, I was induced at 40 + 3, in hind sight I feel it was too early to have been induced, she wasn’t ready yet but I was living overseas where the maternity care varies to what I had heard happens in the UK, plus I feel when you’re pregnant with your 1st you’re at the mercy of the midwife’s more. This time round, as long as baby is ok, I will be happy to wait a little longer until she is ready to come. I want to listen to my body and trust my natural instincts.
Devices with two in mind i.e a fabric / indoor baby carrier and hands free breast pump. I didn’t baby wear lots with Mila, I had a carrier but it was more for outside when we went for walks etc however I feel I may come to rely on one more with the next so I can have my hands free in general to play / cook / look after Mila too.
Involve your older kids
The age gap between Mila and our newest addition will be just over 3 years. A huge perk of having a 3 year old is that she’s always happy and eager to help. She helps me with cooking, cleaning, laundry so I’m definitely going to utilise her interest and get her to help lots with her little sister 💕
Get out my first born newborn clothes
When we left Dubai we sold a lot of the big baby items but Mila’s first clothes I kept lots of. 1. Because I couldn’t bare to part with them and 2. Incase we ever had a second baby.
Remember the hard times will pass / pick your battles
When you’re a first time mum you do naturally worry about most things to do with your baby and stress over the stages, unsure what’s wrong or how long it will last. This time round I know everything is just a phase and the time will pass. Likewise with Mila I want to give her time to adjust and on days when things perhaps aren’t going as smoothly as hoped to just pick my battles. Parenting is SO much easier when you’re not having to say NO all the time.
Prioritise 1 on 1 time to both
Something I’m very conscious of. My bond with Mila is so special to me and I want to keep some 1 on 1 time for us to go on a babychino date, go shopping or play at the park. Double plus: I will get 1 on 1 time with Mila and River will get 1 on 1 time with baby 🥰
Enjoy the help
When I had Mila we lived in Dubai and it was Covid. I didn’t have the physical support of family or a huge network of friends to rely on. This time round we are back in the UK, close to my mum and family and River’s are only a short plane ride away. Mila is also enrolled in a forest nursery for a couple of days a week which will allow me dedicated time to bond with my newborn little love.
Love will be multiplied not divided
This is something I’ve been told over and over. I really can’t imagine life with two little ones although I realise it’s about to happen. When it does I know the love I have for Mila will only multiply for her and her little sister.
Be open to your new baby’s needs.
Just because your first born did things one way doesn’t make it wrong / right for your new baby to do it differently or likewise, just because you may have struggled with certain things ( breastfeeding, naps, colic etc) with your first doesn’t mean that will happen again with your second. Every baby is different.
